By Caleb Dyer

Purpose. A perennial quest which often times leaves the searcher wondering. In the last work of literature read by this group, “Hell is the absence of God,” the protagonist is forced to search for the purpose of the tragic loss of his wife, with his search ultimately ending in a bittersweet achievement that demonstrates that purpose can sometimes be a fruitless search. In “Leaf by Niggle,” the protagonist – a little man called Niggle – struggles to find reason for the endless interruptions to his pursuit of painting the most beautiful picture ever.

The story is divided into three parts, most probably influenced by Tolkien’s Roman Catholic faith. In the first part, Niggle is constantly forced to sacrifice his own desires to attend to the incessant demands of his lame neighbor Parish. Parish constantly asks for help, and although Niggle may not be the most willing helper, the laws of the land and his own kindly nature compel him to help Parish whenever the latter requires assistance. The true irony in this first section is that what ultimately leads to Niggle’s death (the inevitable journey) is a request that causes him to take a bike ride in a storm. This bike ride leaves Niggle sick with a fever that will lead to his death; yet even as he is sentenced to death by nature, he is inspired and realizes exactly what and how he needs to paint upon his canvas in order to achieve his vision. Throughout this first stage of Niggle’s story, the reader is presented with the juxtaposition of the reality that what a person desires or feels purposed to do is not always what they are able or required to do. If this then is the case, the reader is left with the inevitable question: does what I really do matter?

Moving on, we come to the purgatory of Niggle. It is at this stage that Niggle completely forgets his life’s dream, to complete his painting. Instead, he is forced to perform mundane and trivial tasks. When he is on the verge of becoming complacent with his daily routine, it is forced to change. One day, he hears an “inquiry board” discussing Niggle’s own life. Much of the discussion focuses on the fact that Niggle did not do much that is noteworthy in his life, and also did not help enough people. Yet it is also pointed by one member of this board that Niggle died as a result of helping his neighbor, even when that help was pointless and unnecessary. As the reader hears this discussion, the question of purpose continues to rear its head: if Niggle’s loving actions towards his neighbors and towards others have no purpose, even when it ultimately costs him his life, then what is the point of doing any of it?

After Niggle is freed from purgatory, he is heralded into a beautiful country, with a bike that he can use to explore it. While riding his bike, he is startled and amazed to find that his tree – his one painting that he thought unfinished at the start of his journey – was the pinnacle and focal point of a beautiful forest. Indeed, everything surrounding Niggle seems to be something he painted or dreamed of painting. Upon realizing that he needs help, he wishes that his neighbor Parish was with him. Immediately upon wishing this, he finds Parish not too far from him. In this beautiful land, Niggle and Parish become fast friends, and Parish realizes his mistake in dismissing the former and his painting. At the end of the story, the audience learns that many people have benefitted from Niggle’s painting. The land that was inspired by it has helped many to adjust and

prepare for the last stage of their journey, and a painting which seemed pointless and purposeless turns out to be a great blessing to many.

While determining the purpose of one’s life or actions may seem to be a fruitless and hollow endeavor, purpose is found in the end. It is not found in the midst of an action or journey or life, but at the end of it. For Niggle, the purpose of all he had wrought and dreamt was a beautiful country that beckoned those on their final journey to a better and more beautiful place. And for the reader, it is a reminder that the true meaning and purpose of life is found within a community of other people, as opposed to by one’s self.